Dear Heroin, This letter is to formally tell you goodbye. I was more loyal, faithful, dedicated, and infatuated with you then I have ever been with anyone in my life. You were my first thought waking up the morning and my last thought in bed at night. There was never a distance far enough to keep me from you. I have never had anybody who I know I could always depend on – I never had anyone that was always there waiting to embrace me with open arms, on questions asked. With you, I could be myself, it didn’t matter if I was at my best of my worse, you never looked at me differently. You never gave up on me or decided I wasn’t worth staying with. In your presence I had finally found everything I have ever needed. Everything that little girl that I was all of those years back cried herself to sleep for. It was love at first sight. You had me captivated by your very essence and left me lingering for more. It amazed me how fast you became the object of my affection. Suddenly nothing or nobody was as important to me as you … and if they were, I was too lost in you for it to matter. The person I was and the world as I knew it began to turn gray and fade away. The passions, dreams, the pain, the loss and loneliness, and my memories and sense of belonging had become nothing but a hallow shell. I was comfortable being numb. Addiction had taken the driver’s seat, with me as the passenger. It was always a crazy ride with you, a constant adrenaline rush, caos. Your driving was reckless and you definitely had a need for speed. Rules went out of the window. The broken pieces of the ones who loves were left behind us, it didn’t even seem to come to our attention. Lying, manipulating and stealing just seemed to come with the territory. It was us against the world with no mercy. We never had to worry about the hurt, regret, the heartbreak, or the longing for our families back in our lives. That was the best part; you were the cure, but no longer simply a choice. I needed you. I needed you the same as air to breathe. I physically hurt when you were there. My body knew and went through shock of being without you. The kind of hurt I would not wish upon my worst enemy. The emptiness left after your visit, but when you were gone there was no rest of comfort no matter how hard I tried. You left a violent chill that would shake down to my bones, the discomfort left me in bed thrashing around in a desperate attempt for some relief, only there was none to find. Til death did us park, I knew I needed you and you would be there for me always, but in the same sense you were the sickness, you were also the cure. You made death even sound sweet. As if I was spending my last moments with you… talk about being blinded by love after everything I had given up for you, it was all based on a foundation of lies. What is one to do when the one thing they so genuinely love was the very think sucking the life out of them and leaving them for dead? You come with a purpose and I was your puppet. I was on the fast track towards death and destruction. I was so naïve and careless to let myself get caught up in the romance I had with you, that I played your partner in planning my own death. It is not easy, but I want you to know that I forgive you. Not for your sake, but for mine. I refuse to let you rob me of one more second of my life and what I make of it. You were simply doing all of what you know how. It was me who had the problem. I was addicted to you. Although, I do still see you in my dreams quit often, I know that what we have is no longer. From pain comes wisdom and understanding that you can no longer have my loved ones tears. They deserve peace just as I do. Life is going to be better without you. My strength will be powerful. Watch me live, laugh and share my story of overcoming you. I am me and I will have NO PARTS OF YOU! This is the end. This is goodbye.